Monday, September 12, 2011

Being the Mom I didn't have

**As a disclaimer I'd like to say that in no way have I ever felt neglected or unloved.  I just grew up differently than a lot of people and in doing such approach Motherhood in that way**

Okay, now that is out of the way, here goes.  Growing up I didn't live with my parents.  I had very young parents and like to call myself a high school "whoopsie".  Don't get me wrong, I love both of my parents but times were different.  I was brought up in the care of my Great Grandmother (Meme) and later my Aunt and Grammy.  Having said that, I didn't do a whole lot growing up.  I didn't dance, play sports, nor was I outgoing.  Quite the opposite actually, I was a quiet bookworm who spent a lot of time in the tree in my front yard reading.  I was very loved and knew that.  My Mom and Dad (who were also divorced young) have always been in my life, and actually raised my siblings.  I was the only one who lived with Meme.

Now, I am a Mom to three kids of my own.  I'm trying to be the Mom that I didn't have.  I'm not trying to be superMom or go for any medals, but I am trying to be as active in my kids lives as I can.  Although, if at any time they think I'm hovering, I will back off.  I sat down this weekend and wrote down everything that I am involved in for the sake of our kids.  I highly recommend that Moms do this, if only for themselves.  I know that every Mom feels stressed and pressure to be the "superMom" we all have imagined ourselves to be.  I am no where near my vision, but I'm okay with that too.  It's not important to be the best Mom ever, it's important to be the best Mom you can be.

I thought to give you an idea of my list, I'd share a little bit.  Some of the things may sound more difficult than they actually are and some of the not so difficult sounding items actually are, so here goes.

  • 2 of my 3 kids are in soccer.  They love it, so I (I'm giving Chuck credit here because they practice at the exact same time so he takes one!) take at least one of them to their twice weekly practices.

  • Saturdays through October, and some Tuesdays for A, are game days.  We usually get to the soccer fields at around 9:30 A.M. and are there until 2 in the afternoon.

  • My kids have standing therapy appointments weekly.  I'm thankful that they are at the exact same time, in the same building, even if they are with different doctors.

  • CS has story time at the library weekly.

  • A recently joined 4-H and Ren will be joining too.  This is a whole new experience for our family and I can't wait to dive in!

  • I am on the PTO board at A's school and a regular member of the PTO for Ren's school.

  • A is wanting to join the Girl Scouts.  The downside is that there isn't a troop at her school because no one will be a troop leader.  Guess who just volunteered?

  • CS and I are going to participate in preschool nature walks at our local arboretum beginning next week.

Now, this is the short list.  I am not trying to sell myself as a good Mom, but I am trying to realize that what I do is more than just cooking, cleaning and laundry.  This is how I'm trying to be the Mom I didn't have.  I want the kids to know that I "have their backs".  I want them to know that they can always count on me for anything they need.  I can't always give them what they want, but I will try my best to give them what they need.  I want them to know that I am here.  It may sound philosophical or corny, but it's important to me.  They need that security and I am more than happy to provide them with a safety net.  I'm a Mom, that's my job!

No comments:

Post a Comment